INTJs in other relationships
What are INTJs like in friendships & platonic relationships?
In friendships and platonic relationships, INTJs are witty, honest, and full of unique and valuable insights. It takes a while to get them to relax and open up, but once they do, they become an indispensable part of their friend group.
INTJs don’t care much about social status, popularity, or wealth, so they’re unlikely to make friends based on these criteria. Instead, they look for intellectual connections with people who are on a similar wavelength. As a result, they aren’t opposed to befriending outcasts and people with unconventional ideas.
The one struggle most INTJs face in friendships is providing emotional support. When their friends talk about their problems, INTJs’ first instinct is to look for solutions, which isn’t always necessary. But with some effort, INTJs can improve in this aspect as well.
What are INTJs like as parents?
As parents, INTJs are serious, committed, and reliable. They don’t take the parental role lightly, understanding that they are responsible for the child’s mental and emotional growth as well as their physical well-being.
Since independence is one of INTJ’s core values, they want to foster this quality in their children, too. That doesn’t mean they are overly lenient or disinterested in child-rearing. Rather, they give their children the freedom to ask why specific rules are important before enforcing them.
Unsurprisingly, INTJs struggle with the emotional aspect of parenting. Children need affection and validation, which INTJs aren’t very generous with. As a result, parenting can be a challenging experience for this personality type, but it can also encourage growth.
INTJ communication style
INTJ’s communication style is usually straightforward, without excess words or unnecessary tangents. Usually, they speak only after carefully considering what they want to say, so their manner is concise and self-assured.
Given that they aren’t very emotionally expressive, they may come across as overly blunt or cold, whether intentionally or not. This rarely bothers INTJs, though, as they don’t worry much about what others think of them.
What are INTJs like in conflict?
Despite their calm nature, INTJs have a tendency to clash with people. When this happens, they rarely back down, needing to prove they are right.
In other words, INTJs are likely to escalate the argument, especially about a topic they consider important. They don’t typically resort to insults or lose their cool, but they do become increasingly cold and stubborn as the conflict progresses.
3 tips for interacting with INTJs
Avoid small talk
INTJs have a low tolerance for small talk and consider it boring and unnecessary. They also don’t put much stock in social norms, so they’re likely to quickly excuse themselves to avoid small talk, even if it’s considered rude.
Be yourself
Thanks to their dominant Ni, INTJs are excellent at spotting dishonesty. Thus, it’s always a bad idea to pretend to be someone you’re not in their presence—an INTJ will respect you more if you’re honest, even if you have little in common.
Don’t write them off as cold or uncaring
INTJs struggle with emotional expression, but that doesn’t mean they don’t care. Even if they may come across as such, they don’t appreciate being called emotionless and may, in fact, become cold after hearing that.