INFP Compatibility for Romantic Relationships and Friendship
by Lisa Sparrow
If you’ve ever met an INFP, you’ve probably noticed that these gentle souls can easily connect with most people—even their opposites.
Still, it’s undeniable that, like all personality types, they instantly click with some people, while with others, their connection feels slightly awkward or forced.
If you’re curious to learn how INFPs relate to people with different personalities, look no further!
In this all-embracing INFP compatibility and relationship guide, we’ll explore the best and worst INFP matches, their strengths and weaknesses in relationships, INFP communication and parenting styles, and much more!
INFP Compatibility Chart
Before we dive into the depths of INFP compatibility, here’s a useful chart that illustrates how compatible INFPs are with different personality types:
5 Best Matches for INFPs
Itching to learn who the best match for INFP personalities is? Wait no more—here are the personality types INFPs are most compatible with:
#1. ENFJ and INFP Compatibility
Despite having completely different cognitive functions, ENFJs and INFPs are very compatible. That’s because they both have the same priorities—creating meaningful and peaceful relationships—and high emotional intelligence. These two components are the reason why ENFJ and INFP personalities can build a deep emotional connection.
As introverted feeling (Fi) personalities, INFPs tend to keep their feelings to themselves. Emotional expression is one of the main challenges INFPs face in most relationships, but not with ENFJs—they value emotional vulnerability and regard it as a strength rather than a weakness. This enables them to create a safe space for sharing their innermost secrets.
Guided by dominant extraverted feeling (Fe), ENFJs know how to provide INFPs with the encouragement, support, and validation they need to open up about their feelings. They both also love helping people, which makes for a very fulfilling connection, especially since neither of them would take the other for granted.
#2. INFJ and INFP Compatibility
INFP compatibility with the INFJ personality type is one of the highest, as these personality types share a lot in common while also having enough differences to complement each other.
Both of these personalities have abstract minds and enjoy deep conversations. They usually find each other intriguing, which is why INFP relationships with INFJs are quite balanced—neither tries to overpower the other. Moreover, they often share common goals, most of which are related to improving the world in one way or another.
Not to mention, INFJs and INFPs can learn quite a lot from each other. INFPs help INFJs get in touch with their own emotions and embrace their authenticity, whereas INFJs offer INFPs the organization and support they need to realize their dreams.
That said, both INFJs and INFPs lack conflict resolution skills, preferring to withdraw from each other instead of talking it out. Nonetheless, given that both personalities are empathetic and supportive, they can learn how to face conflict together.
#3. ENFP and INFP Compatibility
ENFPs and INFPs strive to live in harmony with their personal values, which makes them surprisingly predictable. In other words, once they learn what matters to one another, they know what to expect from each other. This creates a sense of safety and comfort, but it doesn’t mean that this connection is boring—far from it!
Since both are strong users of extraverted intuition (Ne), these personalities are imaginative and adventurous. Neither are strangers to wanderlust, but ENFPs can further encourage and ignite INFPs’ curiosity and openness to experiences.
Most importantly, both INFPs and ENFPs are independent, so neither will ever feel smothered by the other. They respect each other and celebrate their differences instead of shunning them, allowing for an authentic connection.
#4. ESFJ and INFP Compatibility
Out of all sensing personality types, INFPs usually have the strongest compatibility with the ESFJ personality type, and it’s not difficult to understand why.
Although these two personality types are seemingly different, they’re both sensitive and caring. This tremendously increases the INFPs’ compatibility with ESFJs, as it makes a solid foundation for mutual respect and understanding.
Both ESFJs and INFPs tend to make devoted partners who don’t easily give up, which opens the door for a long-lasting emotional connection. ESFJs can also help INFPs come out of their shells and become more outgoing while respecting their need to occasionally spend time apart.
That said, this pairing works best when both personalities are mature and healthy. Otherwise, ESFJs may become frustrated with INFPs’ lack of practicality, whereas INFPs may feel repulsed by ESFJs’ respect for structure and traditions.
#5. ISFP and INFP Compatibility
ISFP is another sensing personality type that is compatible with INFPs. Since the dominant ISFP cognitive function is also Fi, both personalities respect each other’s individuality, privacy, and feelings. They share a mutual understanding, but it may take some time to develop a close relationship since both personalities can be quite closed off.
Moreover, ISFPs and INFPs are creative and artistic, so they’re likely to have similar hobbies that they can pursue together to strengthen their bond. Both of them also crave spontaneity and adventures, which makes for an exciting relationship. Despite being introverted, they’ll motivate each other to leave their comfort zones and experience life!
That said, INFPs need lots of emotional and mental stimulation. However, ISFPs are usually more grounded and less philosophical than INFPs. For this reason, they can build a deep emotional bond, but INFPs might have to seek a mental connection outside the relationship.
3 Least Compatible Personality Types for INFPs
Now that you know who the INFPs’ best matches are, let’s see which personality types are the least compatible with them.
#1. ESTP and INFP Compatibility
Simply put, the ESTP and INFP compatibility is a hit or miss—these two personality types tend to be drawn to each other, but their flame can quickly die out.
Because of extraverted sensing (Se)—the dominant ESTP cognitive function—ESTPs are dynamic thrill-seekers who enjoy taking risks and using every opportunity to their advantage. It goes without saying that this energy is very different from the soft and quiet aura that INFPs possess.
While some INFPs may enjoy going on adventures with ESTPs, others may find them obnoxious or intimidating. To make this connection work, ESTPs have to learn to gently encourage INFPs to try out new things without making them feel as if they’re being bullied into doing something.
#2. ESTJ and INFP Compatibility
Out of all personality types, ESTJs are by far the least compatible with INFPs, and it isn’t difficult to see why. They’re simply too different!
By nature, INFPs march to the beat of their own drum. They’re quiet rebels, protesting social norms, expectations, tradition, and similar by choosing to stay true to themselves. Many of them are bohemians—artistic, individualistic, and unconventional.
ESTJs, on the other hand, prefer to live according to the rules, which INFPs may find inauthentic and thus repelling. Moreover, ESTJs are prone to imposing rules on others, and that’s something INFPs aren’t willing to go along with.
In other words, ESTJs and INFPs come from completely different planets, so it would cost them loads of time, effort, and energy to find common ground.
#3. ISTJ and INFP Compatibility
Given that ISTJs are structured people who value traditions, it isn’t hard to guess that they’re one of the worst matches for INFPs.
ISTJs may find INFPs too chaotic and absent-minded, which may lead them to perceive INFPs as lazy. Meanwhile, INFPs might consider ISTJs too uptight and bland. Moreover, since both personalities can be quite reserved, they may encounter communication difficulties.
ISTJs can also be quite critical, and they don’t always choose their words carefully. Since INFPs are sensitive, they may take their criticism to heart and become upset. Such a connection is uncomfortable for both personalities—INFPs may feel as if ISTJs keep intentionally hurting their feelings with personal attacks, whereas ISTJs may feel forced to walk on eggshells.
INFP Communication Style
Typically, INFPs fluctuate between passive and assertive communication styles. They love hearing other people’s thoughts but can be reluctant to share theirs if they are in unfamiliar company. While they prefer to listen, they can be surprisingly talkative when passionate about a topic. Most of the time, however, they’ll adapt their communication style to a specific situation.
Generally, INFPs are warm communicators who aren’t judgmental as long as you don’t cross their boundaries and values. For this reason, people often feel comfortable sharing details about their lives with them. INFPs also often use body language clues such as nodding and eye contact to encourage people and show people that they’re actively listening.
Surrounded by their closest friends, INFPs can be very engaging, funny, and even loud. They tend to have unusual senses of humor and love discussing abstract ideas. Since their minds are rather active due to auxiliary Ne, they may lose their train of thought or go off on tangents before coming back to the main idea.
INFPs in Romantic Relationships
Although they’re idealists, INFPs don’t fall in love easily—they may hide their true feelings until they fully trust the person they’re interested in.
That said, once they feel comfortable enough to let someone into their romantic lives, both female and male INFPs make devoted, supportive, and compassionate partners who try their best to maintain peace and harmony.
What INFPs Seek in Relationships
As dreamers and hopeless romantics, INFPs usually have a clear image of an ideal relationship. Although they may have different needs and expectations, here are some of the key things most INFPs look for in a relationship:
- Mutual values. INFPs are loyal to their values, which is why they look for a partner who shares their beliefs.
- Emotional and mental connection. INFPs are anything but shallow. To be happy in a relationship, they need a strong emotional and mental bond with someone who values harmony as much as they do.
- Space. INFPs can’t stand overbearing people who don’t respect their boundaries and independence. They seek partners who understand their need to spend time alone and encourage their independence.
What a Bad Relationship for an INFP Looks Like
In short, a bad relationship for an INFP is one that is filled with conflict and makes them feel smothered. The problem is that once committed, most INFPs will stay in such relationships due to their ceaseless loyalty, idealism, and reluctance to speak about their feelings.
Most INFPs don’t tell their partners when their needs or expectations aren’t met. They also tend to idealize their relationships, completely ignoring signs that something isn’t quite right. When they aren’t happy in a relationship, they’re likely to escape into their fantasy land and create an idealized version of their relationship instead of addressing the problems.
Since INFPs don’t give up on people easily, they rarely initiate breakups. Rather than accepting that it’s time to leave, most INFPs will overlook the bad parts of a relationship just to avoid confrontation or disappointing their partners.
How INFPs Handle Breakups
As highly sensitive and emotional people, INFPs typically find it difficult to deal with breakups. They choose their intimate relationships carefully, so losing them isn’t something they can easily overcome.
Right after the breakup, INFPs will usually resort to their tertiary function, introverted sensing (Si), for comfort. They’ll relive their favorite memories from the relationship, look at pictures, listen to songs that remind them of their former partner, and so on. Alternatively, they may listen to sad music, watch romantic movies, and read tragic novels.
Contrary to popular belief, INFPs don’t do this to hurt themselves even more—it’s simply their way of processing emotions and letting go.
INFP Strengths and Weaknesses in Relationships
Generally speaking, building a close relationship with any personality type requires a level of vulnerability. Naturally, this causes people’s strong and weak points to come to light.
So you know what to expect when dating an INFP, let’s check out their key strengths and weaknesses in relationships!
INFPs’ Strengths in Relationships
To begin with, here are the best characteristics of INFPs that are particularly visible in relationships:
- Loyalty. INFPs are hopeless romantics who strive for lifelong relationships instead of short-term flings.
- Compassion. Sensitive and caring, INFPs are concerned with other people’s feelings as much as their own.
- Ability to compromise. As selfless individuals, INFPs seek solutions that leave both parties satisfied.
- Thoughtfulness. INFPs tend to make mental notes to remember your favorite dishes, places, music, and so on. As you might expect, they love making heartwarming surprises!
- Respect. Independent and individualistic, INFPs show a great deal of respect for their partner’s boundaries, privacy, and identity.
INFPs’ Weaknesses in Relationships
Now that you know the good parts of being in a relationship with an INFP, here are some of their weaknesses you should be aware of:
- Reserved nature. Not wanting to be a burden to anyone, INFPs struggle with sharing their thoughts and feelings.
- Hypersensitivity. As very sensitive people, INFPs tend to avoid conflict and criticism, which makes it difficult to solve relationship problems
- Self-criticism. INFPs can be harsh toward themselves, but INFP-T personalities in particular are prone to blaming themselves for anything that goes wrong.
- Idealism. Some INFPs, especially unhealthy ones, tend to imagine an idealized version of their partners and may become disappointed when it doesn’t match reality.
What are INFPs like as Parents?
As parents, INFPs are typically liberal and reassuring, regarding their children as individuals rather than extensions of themselves. They have strong personal boundaries, never imposing their will on their children or forcing them to be different from what they really are. Quite the contrary—INFP parents foster their children’s individuality and self-expression.
Thanks to their openness, INFPs usually maintain close relationships with their children regardless of their age. While living through their children’s teenage years is a nightmare to most people, INFPs tend to gently guide their kids through adolescence and support their experiments as long as they aren’t harmful in any way.
That said, INFP parents can be rather disorganized, so it’s important that they find a way to cultivate not only autonomy but also discipline in their children. Still, despite their free-spirited approach to parenting, INFPs are usually successful at teaching children their values and beliefs.
What are INFPs like as Friends?
Like most introverts, INFPs prefer to have a few close friends rather than a bunch of acquaintances. Thanks to their loyalty and devotion, they usually keep their friends for life but can find it difficult to make new ones. While they get along with nearly everyone, INFPs are very selective about whom they let inside their inner circle.
Although they enjoy spending time alone, INFPs are prone to feeling lonely. For this reason, they strive to build friendships based on trust and emotional connection with people who give them plenty of personal space. Guided by their personal values and seeking to be surrounded by soul mates, INFPs carefully choose friends who align with their beliefs and philosophy.
INFPs are also very caring toward their friends. Seeing a buddy being treated unfriendly can unleash their fierce protective side. No matter how timid they may be, INFPs will always defend their friends. Needless to say, they also enjoy helping their friends out and are always there to lend a shoulder to cry on.
And that’s everything you need to know about INFP compatibility for friendships and romantic relationships!
Essentially, INFPs are the most compatible with other intuitive feelers and the least compatible with personality types characterized by sensing and judging traits.
That said, INFPs can get on and create meaningful long-term relationships with virtually any personality type (yes, even ESTJs!) as long as both people are mature and willing to grow.
INFP Compatibility FAQ
#1. Who are INFPs attracted to?
INFPs are typically attracted to ENFP, ENFJ, and INFJ personality types. All of them share the key qualities INFPs look for in a partner—a fondness for meaningful conversations, empathy, and strong values.
#2. Who are INFPs most likely to marry?
INFPs may marry people of any personality type, but they’re most likely to marry ENFJs, INFJs, and ESFJs. Not only do these personality types naturally click with INFPs, but they can also help them become more organized.
#3. Who are INFPs most compatible with?
INFPs tend to be most compatible with other intuitive feeling personality types, including ENFPs, INFJs, and ENFJs. They are also naturally compatible with some sensing personalities, such as ESFJs and ISFPs. As a general rule, INFPs are highly compatible with feeling personalities, as they value emotional connection above all else.
#4. Who are INFPs least compatible with?
INFPs are least compatible with SJ personality types such as ISTJs and ESTJs. INFPs are creative, free spirits who don’t like to follow the crowd, so they often find these personalities too traditional, bossy, and dull.
#5. Are INFP and INFP compatible?
INFP compatibility with other INFPs is very high in friendships, as they naturally understand each other, easily find commonalities, and have similar tastes. However, being too similar to balance each other out, two INFPs may not be very compatible as work or romantic partners.