A Comprehensive Guide to the Rare INFJ Male Personality

by Lisa Sparrow

16 min

Deciphering a mysterious INFJ male isn’t a walk in the park.

These men have unique and curious personalities. While the personality of a male INFJ often confuses the people around them, it also makes them insanely attractive.

Knowing how the inner mechanisms of INFJ men work can help you understand them better and build long-lasting relationships with them. This is why we bring you this useful article—to teach you:

  • What Is an INFJ Male?
  • What Strengths Are Characteristic of an INFJ Male?
  • What Weaknesses Do INFJ Men Have?
  • What Are INFJ Males Like in Relationships?

…and much more. So, let’s get started!

What Is an INFJ Male?

There’s a good reason why INFJ males are known as “either all or nothing.” No other personality type reflects so many contradictions and opposing traits as they do. At the same time, INFJ men:

  • Seem moody but are super sensitive. A serious or reserved attitude in an INFJ male hides vulnerability and a big heart. Since they are introverted, INFJ men don’t show their feelings often—they keep this treat for the ones who deserve their trust and attention.
  • Are both feminine and masculine. Due to their sensitivity, INFJ males connect with women effortlessly. Still, they have attractive masculine energy that makes heads turn.
  • Flee from superficial things, but love things that look nice. Although they don’t think physical traits are the most important feature of a person, INFJ males like dolling up and looking neat. They tend to have a great fashion sense thanks to their inferior cognitive function, extraverted sensing (Se).
  • Love people but can cut them off in a breeze. If an INFJ male gives you all their love and affection but gets nothing in return, he’ll easily do the so-called INFJ door slam. In other words, they can simply disappear from your life without any explanation if you disappoint them.

What Strengths Are Characteristic of an INFJ Male?

When analyzing INFJ males, you’ll realize that they possess a strong fusion of the following strengths:

  • Intuition. INFJs’ dominant cognitive function is introverted intuition (Ni), which allows them to profoundly feel the motives of other people. You can’t fool them. They know when you lie or hide things and will pick up on the slightest signs that indicate something is wrong.
  • Empathy. If you need a good listener by your side, get yourself an INFJ guy. They have a wonderful gift of compassion and always strive to identify with people. For them, making others feel understood and appreciated is a joy unlike any other.
  • Thoughtfulness. An INFJ man will always want to know if you ate or rested well and whether you need something. It’s in their nature to put other people’s needs before everything else and ensure everyone is doing well.
  • Creativity. Focusing on the big picture throughout life brings INFJ males solid brainstorming abilities and a vivid imagination. They use their “me time” to contemplate and develop new ideas.

What Weaknesses Do INFJ Men Have?

INFJ men’s personalities are truly magnetic but can sometimes be too much to handle.

These males are prone to:

  • Overthinking. Whether they want it or not, INFJ men are prone to reviving moments and conversations from the past. They’ll analyze them to the bits and wonder what you meant by saying this or that. These males also overthink when it comes to potential friendships and love, wondering why someone would choose them.
  • Taking everything personally. Generally speaking, you should think twice before criticizing an INFJ male. Mostly because you never know how they will respond to your comments, even if they are well-meaning. Such things can easily upset them and even make them aggressive.
  • Fleeing from conflicts. Men with this personality type would rather retreat and wait for the problem to solve itself than get into a fight. Arguments and unresolved issues ruin the harmony they long for and make them feel anxious. Hence, male INFJs do their best to get away from conflict and wait for things to go smoothly again.
  • Setting unrealistic expectations. INFJ men are looking for perfect friends, partners, and jobs, and they don’t accept anything less than that. Since such things don’t exist, they often fail to find what they need. This shatters their illusions and makes them unhappy.

4 Most Common Problems INFJ Men Face

Despite their great personalities, INFJ men still face different issues that can make their lives and relationships challenging.

So, let’s take a look at some of the problems that most male INFJs will relate to.

#1. Very Sensitive and Emotional Nature

For INFJ males, being emotional can be both a curse and a blessing. They are way more sensitive than other personality types. As a result, they get offended quite easily and don’t respond calmly even to well-intentioned criticism.

Also, due to their soft nature, they may come across as less masculine to other people. For this reason, they often tend to hide this part of their character behind a cold, emotionless façade. Not everyone can see the real nature of an INFJ male—only the ones who are really worth it.

#2. Difficulty Building Close Relationships

Although you can trust them with your life once they befriend you, INFJ men don’t get to that point easily.

They are natural introverts, which means they truly worship their alone time and don’t always feel the need for other people’s company. The ones who care about them must understand their urge to occasionally run away from the world. Yet, not everyone is willing to make that sacrifice all the time.

#3. Hard to Find a Satisfying Career

If you know at least one INFJ man, you’ll notice that they’re intrigued by many things. In fact, they have so many interests that it’s quite hard for them to choose only one as their primary profession.

Working only for money doesn’t fulfill their professional needs. They need something compelling enough to keep their attention and (ideally) give them the joy of helping humanity. For this reason, male INFJs tend to analyze different job opportunities trying to find the perfect one, but often get confused due to analysis paralysis.

#4. Stubbornness

We’ve already mentioned how difficult it is for INFJ men to cope with opinions and beliefs opposite to theirs. They rarely deviate from what they believe to be right, even if everything points to them being wrong.

Due to this, people usually mistake them for narrow-minded individuals unwilling to respect others’ points of view. This can ruin their existing relationships and make it tricky for them to develop new ones.

3 Examples of Famous INFJ Men

Have you wondered what being an INFJ in the celebrity world looks like? Here are a few examples of world-famous INFJ men.

#1. Tom Selleck

Despite his charm and seemingly determined spirit, Selleck is quite shy by nature. The legend says his wife, Jillie Mack, had to ask him out first. He was too anxious to make a move on her since he thought she was too pretty for him!

This famous softie is also extremely private and doesn’t like sharing details about his love life and family. Many people believe this is the main reason he managed to keep his marriage happy and healthy through all these years.

#2. Adam Sandler

We know Adam Sandler as the goofy, clumsy guy from Hollywood comedies. But there’s much more to him than meets the eye. In real life, he’s a true sweetheart and a generous friend.

According to The Richest, upon finishing the movie Grown Ups, three of his colleagues left the set with a new Masserati. It was a thank you gift from Sandler for their dedication to the shooting.

He’s also a philanthropist and has supported many causes. So far, he’s donated money and other assets to more than 20 charities worldwide.

#3. Morgan Freeman

The first thing that comes to mind when someone says “Morgan Freeman”? It’s usually three words—mild, calm, and reserved.

Acting isn’t the only gift this brilliant and soft-spoken INFJ man has. This multitalented individual worked as a dancer and sang on Broadway while also being a part of a musical theater group.

As a true INFJ, he’s always ready to listen to others and hear their opinions. Yet, he holds firmly to his beliefs and actively speaks against racism and terrorism.

What Are INFJ Males Like in Relationships?

To have a satisfying love life, an INFJ male needs a true connection.

They aren’t as fascinated by physical beauty as much as they appreciate wisdom, uniqueness, and authenticity. For this reason, it’s hard for them to find fulfillment in superficial and short-term affairs.

Even though they long for deep relationships, INFJ men find it difficult to approach the person they’re interested in. They are shy by nature and will rarely muster the courage to make the first move. Yet, once they manage to break the ice and get to know you better, they will turn into your biggest fans.

Dating and Relationship Tips For INFJ Males

What can an INFJ man do to improve their love life and make dating an enjoyable experience? Here are some suggestions:

  • Consider people who have personality types compatible with yours. Some personality types may be a better match for you than others, including ENTPs and ENFPs. Their extroversion is not invasive and will not negatively affect your need for peace. Quite the contrary—it will bring out the best in you.
  • Give online dating a go. This may not sound like the perfect solution for you, an INFJ who yearns for a deeper connection. Still, it’s a great way to get in touch with people who share the same interests and life values as you. If they catch your attention, you can always meet them in person and get to know them better.
  • Don’t use being an INFJ male as an excuse. Being an INFJ doesn’t justify the lack of initiative or your tendency to set high expectations. Take responsibility for your actions and learn how to overcome your insecurities by working on yourself.
  • Suppress the urge to run away from conflict. Even the healthiest relationships sometimes bring clashes of opinion. You must learn to suppress the typical INFJ fear of confrontation and solve conflicts head-on.

4 Best Career Paths and Jobs For INFJ Males

What makes an INFJ man attracted to a specific career opportunity is its compatibility with their character and established values.

Below you’ll find a short but useful list of jobs an INFJ male may find fulfilling and life-changing.

#1. Writing

INFJ men love analyzing the world around them. For this reason, they will enjoy putting their thoughts and observations on paper and sharing them with others.

Their extensive vocabulary allows them to express themselves better than other types. It also makes it easier for them to delve into various topics of interest and get the best out of them. Besides writing fiction, male INFJs make great bloggers, journalists, and copywriters.

#2. Mental Health

The altruistic nature of this personality type is what makes INFJ males amazing psychologists, psychiatrists, and therapists. They are natural soul healers, born to empower others and teach them how to use their potential to achieve life goals.

Besides that, INFJ men have a special gift of connecting with people and understanding their concerns and weak points. Thanks to their empathy, they can easily put themselves in other people’s shoes, thus helping others overcome their insecurities and change their lives.

#3. Law

One of the missions that leads INFJs through life is defending moral principles and standing up for what’s right. Thanks to this, INFJ males can be outstanding lawyers.

They enjoy getting in touch with people who have been wronged and providing the necessary assistance. By using their skills to help the ones in need, they show their humanitarian nature and make sure justice is served.

#4. Science and Research

INFJ men yearn to make the world a better place. For this reason, they often find their purpose in developing mechanisms that will help humanity work better. Jobs related to research and science help them achieve their life missions and improve the world they live in.

Also, many INFJ males don’t feel comfortable working in huge teams or in crowded places. Choosing a profession related to scientific fields satisfies their need for peace and quiet. It also leaves room for them to brainstorm fresh ideas more easily and think beyond their limits.

5 Hobbies That Best Fit INFJ Males

Ideal hobbies for INFJ men are also closely related to their prominent personality traits and life interests. They’re most likely to feel fulfilled when engaging in activities such as:

  • DIY and crafting. There’s no better feeling for INFJ men than seeing different supplies turning into a whole new piece in their hands. Besides collecting tools, they’ll love restoring furniture, working on house improvement, or building new objects.
  • Cooking and making beverages. Preparing delicious meals and experimenting with new tastes can be quite a relaxing activity for an INFJ man. It’s another opportunity for them to express their creativity and do something nice for their loved ones. They may also be interested in discovering craft beer brewing secrets or mastering cocktail making.
  • Reading. Enjoying a quiet evening with a book in their hands is what most INFJs cherish more than any other spare time activity. Being hopeless dreamers, INFJ men often use reading to escape reality and further develop their imagination.
  • Volunteering. If they can make someone’s life or work easier, INFJs will do it. Men with this personality type love taking care of other people. They will gladly engage in helping those in need without any compensation.
  • Spending time in nature. INFJ males usually find joy in spending their “me time” hiking or visiting lovely green places around their area. It allows them to recharge and enjoy their peace and solitude for a while before they return to the real world.

Also, check out our ultimate guide to the INFJ Female Personality!

FAQ About INFJ Males

#1. How can you spot an INFJ male?

The first thing you will probably notice in an INFJ male is the mystical, soul-piercing INFJ stare. It’s not always intentional—they sometimes don’t even realize they’re gazing at someone.

INFJ males also don’t show intense emotions on their faces. For this reason, they often seem cold or unapproachable.

#2. What makes INFJ males attractive?

People like enigmas—and that’s exactly what makes INFJ males attractive. They seem so calm and reserved on the outside but hide the whole mystical world behind that façade. This intrigues many people, so they get the urge to decipher the way INFJ men think and act.

#3. Do INFJ males fall in love easily?

INFJ men don’t fall head over heels for someone so easily. They seek long-term relationships and don’t enjoy “no strings attached” relationships. For this reason, they don’t usually get easily fascinated by someone.

Yet, if they get to know the person better and feel a connection with them, INFJ men will get attached to them pretty quickly.

#4. How do you tell if an INFJ is mad at you?

Avoidance is the first warning sign that indicates an INFJ is mad at you. What works best for them is withdrawing and spending some time alone to think about everything. Some of them may act as if nothing happened until they sort out the situation in their heads.

In extreme cases, they’ll simply shut down and do the infamous INFJ door slam. If they’re extremely hurt, they will not hesitate to cut you off completely without prior warning.

Key Takeaways

Upon reading this extensive study on the peculiar personalities of male INFJs, we hope you’ve learned just about everything you need to know about these unique men.

Let’s point to some crucial facts again to wrap all this up:

  • No matter how contradictory INFJ men may be, they possess a rare and special charm that attracts people like a magnet.
  • While their intuition, creativity, and empathy come across as their best traits, their dark side usually hides insecurities, unrealistic expectations, and a lack of self-love.
  • INFJ men often opt for careers that allow them to provide the necessary assistance to people who need it and change their lives for the better.

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